My First Good Birthday

Dude, I had a great birthday. First time I felt great and not weird. Finally!

Nothing super special about it, but I wasn't expecting anything.

I just delighted in seeing my best friend who brought me a dozen mini bunt cakes of assorted flavors. And my uncle who sent a delightful email and had his almost-adopted son sing me happy birthday on the phone. And an old crush wrote a great happy birthday note on my facebook:

"I hope your birthday is filled with magic and sprinkles and dancing and rainbows and chocolate and smiles and puppies and wonderful!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY STEPHANIE!!! you are cool"

And I had lunch with friends and my first glass of wine. I went to work and had a great conversation with my boss. We chatted for like 15 minutes about life. He's the nicest person in the world.

Finally, I finished the night with Biblestudy. I received a card signed by everyone, and my current crush was there. In my card he wrote, "You're pretty funny. Keep it up." Bahahahaha Hilarious. He made many funny jokes tonight.

You know...as a comedian I laugh at things that other people don't laugh at. Instead of laughing I think, "Oh yea, I see how that joke works."

A joke that makes me laugh has to catch me off guard and have a spritz of quirkiness....or align with personal experiences I thought were unique to me.

Boy WOULD Happen Now

Tonight my wonderful crush approached me to tell me that he thought my Facebook status was super funny and made him laugh out loud!

We proceeded to chat about things. He asked me about what I was studying (which I have told him before--he's a forgetter) and also about where I'd be this summer (I told him this before too). Great. I leave for a different city in a week just when we're starting to have cute encounters.

He's quiet yet hilarious. And RELAXED beyond all reason.

This is kinda torture. And then if I meet someone in the new city, I'll have to leave him to come back here after the summer. And then I'll leave to go back to the new city after a few months. It's just so DIFFICULT to do commit to anything under these conditions (not just boys).

He's so attractive!!!!

I had fun tonight!

It's Friday. Instead of wasting another night in my room alone, I went to a movie with a house mate. An indie movie in a tiny theater. "Salmon Fishing in the Yemen." The movie was just ok, but it was great just not being in my room. I have been neglecting my social life. Can't do that anymore.

My Birthday is Hard to Deal with

My birthday is in two weeks.

Ugh. I think I'll make hundreds of cupcakes and pass them out all day. To focus on other people. Because let's face it...I don't handle my birthdays very well when people focus on me. I actually ran away from my birthday party last year. "Why is Stephanie running into the distance? Wait, we can't see her anymore." Not good.

I've never had a great birthday party. I can't remember a single one that made me want to kick my heels up and shout.

I've always done the same thing......eat food and converse with friends. Woohoo. Sounds like every other day of my life. Partay.

Maybe I should do something different that's not about me. I don't know. The best days are never planned. They're cultivated by destiny and refined in the fires of shared agony. No, really. One of the best times I had was being on a boat in a storm. Hundreds of people were throwing up, and I sat at the same table as the guy I liked. ...maybe it was more like clinging to the table than sitting at it, but anyway... to be that miserable with someone else is really special.

Oh no...I just calculated.....I'll be PMSing on my birthday. Bahahaha